Signed From: The Sand Siblings
by The Kazekage of Suna
Summary: Sequel to: "Signed From: Your Not So Loyal Author" After Gaara having his journal violated by his siblings, they all agreed it was time to have a family journal...and you could say that this idea may not have been the best...
1. Prologue of Madness

The Kaze: Ah welcome, thanks for checking out the prologue!

The fonts:

Gaara

_Temari _

**Kankuro**

* * *

March 1st-

After having my journal violated and written in, and just basically molested by my siblings...we all agreed that it was time to have a family journal. This is even worse than my own "private" journal.

* * *

_Oh shut up Gaara, this is a fantastic idea! I think it is great for family bonding!_

* * *

**I feel...really...like a girl right now...why the hell do we need a family journal when we are all in the same house?**

* * *

_Kankuro shut up, just shut up, we don't always have the chance to talk so this is a nice way to jot down a few lines before we walk out and go our own ways for the day!_

* * *

I think I am going to contract a disease knowing Kankuro manhandled this book.

* * *

**You are such a drama queen, Gaara.**

* * *

_Kankuro, if he's the queen you're the princess._

* * *

Kankuro was owned. Point to Temari.

* * *

**Damn it all. **


	2. Gender and Tampons?

The Kazekage: So the official beginning...of this sequel...it's gonna be weird not writing Signed From Your Not So Loyal Author...but..I have a lot brewing for this! *evil grin*

The fonts:

Gaara

_Temari_

**Kankuro**

* * *

May 2nd-

Today seemed to be rather...boring...Just sitting here...writing in this pathetic excuse of a family therapist...

* * *

_GAARA! Our family doesn't need therapy! How could you?!_

* * *

**Well..if we r ****diskussing thiz mater then itz Gaara that neez halp.**

* * *

Kankuro, you just took grammar and spelling, then brutally murdered it all.

* * *

_Kankuro...you aren't a damn child, what the hell was that?_

* * *

**_YOLO._**

* * *

Can I hurt him?

* * *

_Did he just say YOLO!? Where's my fan!?_

* * *

**You can't jack my swag Temmy Terd.**

* * *

Temmy Terd...

* * *

_YOU BASTARD! THAT'S IT!_

* * *

**Someone's tampon is in a bit too far...**

* * *

Oh my god...

* * *

_KANKURO I AM GOING TO CASTRATE YOU WITH A BLENDER!_

* * *

**I DEEPLY APOLOGIZE FOR MY SINS, OH GREAT, POWERFUL, AND BEAUTIFUL GODDESS TEMARI!**

* * *

I think I am going to take this journal and put it away for the day...

* * *

_Good idea. _


	3. Bitch, did I stutter?

The Kaze: Well my end of the year finals are over...sigh high school... anyways. If you guys were with me...a year ago..you must remember how much I use to update over the summer...well not this summer :( I have changed my ways and changed as a person. I work, I have to do some summer school work, my friends have become a bigger part of my life, a special someone is in my life... :)

The fonts:

Gaara

_Temari_

**Kankuro**

* * *

May 3rd-

**Hai guys! Omg are you like so ready for 2night!?**

* * *

I could've sworn we had this conversation about grammar...

* * *

_Gaara, honestly no one gives a shit. _

* * *

Temari, shame on you the profanity is not necessary.

* * *

**Did you ****seriously just tell off Tem?**

* * *

What makes you think I am afraid.

* * *

_OH SO YOU AREN'T __AFRAID!? YOU WANT TO TEST THAT PERIOD HEAD!?_

* * *

**O.O**

* * *

Excuse me, did you just call me... "period head"?

* * *

_Did I stutter? _

* * *

**Bitch, did she stutter? **

* * *

No.

* * *

**Shit is about to go DOWN.**

* * *

_No, I am going to keep calm! _

* * *

Temari...are you sure?

* * *

**Uh...**

* * *

_God give me STRENGTH so I DON'T BEAT THE PERIOD OUT OF MY BROTHER! _

* * *

Temari I am not capable of having a period. I am male.

* * *

_You wan't that changed!?_

* * *

No, I quite like my gender.

* * *

**I think it's time to be done here...**


	4. Purrfect Puns

The Fonts:

Gaara

_Temari_

**Kankuro**

* * *

May 4th-

* * *

_I say we all go the zoo! _

* * *

Temari we don't need to go to the zoo...We have Kankuro.

* * *

**Fuck off Gaara!**

* * *

_Despite how rude that was...I give you props Gaara. That was a wonderful insult delivery. _

* * *

Thank you Temari, I feel like it was quite a deserving feeling for myself.

* * *

**Gaara you are such a no life swag-less person.**

* * *

_Did he just..._

* * *

How many times have I gone over this with you, Kankuro? No on cares about swag, or "your" swag which is just your inflated ego with feline attire.

* * *

**That hurt.**

* * *

_Good._

* * *

**Why are you two so mean to me!?**

* * *

This is going to sound bad...

* * *

**Go on...**

* * *

We take joy in your suffering.

* * *

**...**

* * *

_...Uh_

* * *

**Fuck it, I'm out.**

* * *

Kankuro certainly had colorful language...

* * *

_Like his make up._

* * *

**_IT'S NOT MAKE UP IT'S THE FACE PAINT OF A MAN AT WAR! _**

* * *

What are you battling, Barbie?

* * *

_Cats?_

* * *

**YOU TWO ARE AWFUL!**

* * *

_There's no time for this Kankuro...not right...meow..._

* * *

Temari that pun was... "purrfect"...

* * *

**I can't even...**

* * *

_Hair ball?_

* * *

Cat got your tongue?

* * *

**Go to hell!**


	5. The Death of The Demon Hell Spawn

The Fonts:

Gaara

_Temari_

**Kankuro**

* * *

May 5th-

* * *

_I have an issue._

* * *

If Shikamaru got you pregnant I will castrate him with Kankuro's puppets.

* * *

**I will personally change his gender.**

* * *

_I WILL CASTRATE THE BOTH OF YOU IF YOU SPEAK OF HIM IN SUCH A WAY AND I AM NOT __PREGNANT DAMN YOU._

* * *

She's hormonal.

* * *

**Don't you mean "whore"- monal...**

* * *

No. Just, no.

* * *

_FUCK YOU KANKURO._

* * *

Temari if you are in need of tampons or any other feminine need...I can always retrieve some for you...

* * *

_I am NOT ON MY PERIOD!_

* * *

**Why are there tear stains on the journal with black smudges...**

* * *

_MY CAT DIED!_

* * *

The...Demon...Hell...Spawn...

* * *

**Is dead...**

* * *

Kankuro would you please make up a list?

* * *

**The party starts in an hour.**

* * *

Thank you.

* * *

_YOU TWO ARE SO AWFUL! MY CAT IS DEAD AND YOU WANT TO THROW A PARTY!?_

* * *

**I think Ryu could have a friend now...**

* * *

I feel that you are indeed right, Kankuro. After this rather satisfying "tragic" news we can celebrate.

* * *

**How'd that bastard die anyways?**

* * *

_CUDDLYKINZ WAS KILLED BY A DESERT HAWK! _

* * *

Temari that bird was clearly an exorcist... who was also an extremist... This new news...has caused...a smile...

* * *

The Kazekage: Have you ever wanted to know about Kankuro's personal journal... The Special life of Kankuro by Kakashi the Moo Cow...go read his.. "diary" which is an official edition to my Sabaku Saga.


	6. Kankuro's Boobs

The Fonts:

Gaara

_Temari_

**Kankuro**

* * *

May 6th-

* * *

Baki shared news with me...

* * *

**What?**

* * *

He found out that...they want to have a vice Kazekage...

* * *

**...**

* * *

_What, why?_

* * *

They think that having a vice will be good for my mental health.

* * *

**BWAHAHAHHAHA WHAT MENTAL HEALTH!?**

* * *

_Shut the hell up Kanky._

* * *

I declined it and asked for a secretary.

* * *

**Uh...what happened to the last one..**

* * *

_Yeah what happened..._

* * *

The fan girls attacked her, she is hospitalized..

* * *

_I think your __secretary needs a body guard..._

* * *

**I could be the guard...of her body.**

* * *

_Kankuro you won't get laid your fat man boobs would suffocate her. _

* * *

Kankuro has boobs...?

* * *

_Yup, they're genuine too...Kankuro I think you'd __easily fill my bras._

* * *

**Sorry I can't wear those nursing bras.**

* * *

_Kankuro don't get your man tits in a bunch..._

* * *

His thong already is...

* * *

_Oh my god why..._

* * *

**Why am I always tortured...**

* * *

_**The Kazekage: Have you ever wanted to know about Kankuro's personal journal... The Special life of Kankuro by Kakashi the Moo Cow... If you review it a lot (she's my best friend) I'll write a longer chapter.**_


	7. Till You Were 15

The Fonts:

Gaara

_Temari_

**Kankuro**

* * *

May 7th-

**Gaara.**

* * *

What.

* * *

_This will be interesting._

* * *

**Last night.**

* * *

Yes...

* * *

_..._

* * *

**You cried in your sleep.**

* * *

No. I don't cry.

* * *

_That's...a lie, Gaara._

* * *

**You started hysterically sobbing about someone taking your gourd.**

* * *

Kankuro. I. Don't. Cry.

* * *

_I don't know why I'm laughing._

* * *

**Temari! Have you no shame! It was quite HILARIOUS. Seriously, ****he sobbed and sucked his thumb and I think wet the bed!**

* * *

_YOU'RE HORRIBLE, BUT OH MY GOSH! Wait. GAARA DID YOU PISS THE BED!?_

* * *

Kankuro, shut the hell up you didn't stop pissing the bed till you were 15.

* * *

**DAMN IT.**

* * *

_AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!_

* * *

Yes, laugh.

* * *

**Shut up Temari, you didn't have boobs till you were 15!**

* * *

I think brother is mad.

* * *

**I could choke you.**

* * *

_Oh. You're terrifying_!

* * *

I'm trembling with fear. Oh gosh the horror.

* * *

**That's Temari in the morning, she-devil.**

* * *

_EXCUSE ME?!_

* * *

I'm out.


	8. This is my Jam

Frequent updates to come. :) P.s if your review amuses me... I'll respond.

**aishachase97: FANFICERRRRRRRR.**

**Prim The Amazing: Torturing Gaara amuses me.**

**ZakuroU: My friend, insanity of my mind was breached...where's my jacket.**

The Fonts:

Gaara

_Temari_

**Kankuro**

* * *

May 8th

**OH I HAVE A TOPIC!**

* * *

Go on...

* * *

_Hmm...alright_

* * *

**SHIKAMARU.**

* * *

KANKURO! We do not utter the devils name in this household!

* * *

_KANKURO! AND GAARA! HE IS MY BOYFRIEND._

* * *

**Oh IT ALL makes sense now! I thought he was your bitch.**

* * *

Woof, woof.

* * *

Fuck you two!

* * *

**I feel offended. Temari, your vulgar language hurts others.**

* * *

_Pussy._

* * *

Temari.

* * *

_Meow...meow._

* * *

That's what I thought.

* * *

**Temari. You know Gaara and I would have a thrill if we never met him.**

* * *

Yes.

* * *

_Oh my god, you two are horrible._

* * *

No we aren't.

* * *

**Gaara, he's influencing her to make our own sister hate us.**

* * *

Where's my gourd.

* * *

_Gaara..._

* * *

**Good idea, I need my puppets...**

* * *

_I SWEAR TO GOD, I WILL MURDER THE BOTH OF YOU._

* * *

Temari, please, that already happens once a month.

* * *

**Oh hot damn...**

* * *

This is indeed my jam.


	9. Just Shut up!

The Fonts:

Gaara

_Temari_

**Kankuro**

* * *

May 9th

**I think it's time we discuss our boundaries.**

* * *

What?

* * *

**Temari came in my room without knocking.**

* * *

So?

* * *

**I was...**

* * *

Let me guess in your own terms,"Butt ass naked"?

* * *

_OH GOD THE HORROR! _

* * *

Called it, where were you?

* * *

_BLEACHING MY EYES, I FEAR I LOST THE VIRGINITY OF THE INNOCENCE IN THEM._

* * *

**I FEEL AMUSED BY THAT! OH PLEASE, YOU'VE PROBABLY SEEN SHIKAMARU NAKED.**

* * *

I have no part in this.

* * *

_MY EYES BLEED._

* * *

I'm sorry you had to see that Temari. It's always scary when he forgets his towel.

* * *

_OR HIS BRA._

* * *

I doubt he is that fat.

* * *

**AT LEAST I DON'T HAVE A CHEST THAT COULD POKE SOMEONE'S EYES OUT.**

**OR ONE THAT BLOCKS THE DAMN SUN OUT!**

* * *

Kankuro...calm your...man...forget it.

* * *

_EXCUSE ME?! AT LEAST MY BRAIN ISN'T THE SIZE OF YOUR-_

* * *

TEMARI.

* * *

**Grrrrr...**

* * *

I think we need to stay calm. Temari, knock on doors. Kankuro, remember your towel.

* * *

_There isn't much to cover anyways!_

* * *

**GO TO HELL BIG CHESTED BIMBO.**

* * *

Will you both, shut the fuck up!

* * *

_..._

* * *

**...**

* * *

Thank you.


	10. Twerkful Death

Dis Be Teh Author: Teh author needs to move her ASS and update. But...she's just so...She haz no excuses...She'll...come up with one eventually.

The Fonts:

Gaara

_Temari_

**Kankuro**

* * *

May 10th-

_I think I should launch a perfume line! "Temari's Temptations"! It's been a secret dream of mine! _

* * *

***Gags* "Temari's Temptations" please! It'd be "Temari's Terrible Temper".**

* * *

Intriguing alliteration... Might I add, "Temari's Trash(that she needs to taken out)".

* * *

**...Gaara that was fucking awful...**

* * *

_YOU TWO SHOULD BE MORE SUPPORTIVE! _

* * *

Fine. "Temari's Tainted Thorns".

* * *

**Dumb. "Temari's Tears and the Sounds of Death."**

* * *

You are horrible at this Kakuro. It should clearly be, "Temari's Tacky Scents."

* * *

_TACKY!?_

* * *

**Wrong move man, wrong move.**

* * *

_Why. Why do I even bother._

* * *

**Oh dude! Gaara, I have one, "Temari's Twerkful Tease".**

* * *

That is absolutely horribly amusing.

* * *

_You are so fucking gross, Kankuro._

* * *

**I'm not the one twerking with your retarded fruit head.**

* * *

You. Twerked. With. Shikamaru.

* * *

_Gaara do you even know what twerking is!?_

* * *

Of course I do! What do you think I am, 12?

* * *

**Temari he's a grown little man.**

* * *

Shut up, Kankuro. Not everything about me is little.

* * *

_What the actual fuck..._

* * *

**What is wrong with you, Temari! His heart is huge! **

* * *

_Is it wrong I want to ask...what heart?_

* * *

Very. Wrong. And Also Kankuro...You knew she did that...and he's still alive...

* * *

**Shh...I have to go feed my slave...**

* * *

Oh I understand... Good...very...very good.

* * *

_What happened.. WHERE IS SHIKA!?_

* * *

Nowhere.

* * *

**It'll be over shortly.**


	11. Kankuro As Co-Kazekage, Please!

GO JOIN MY FORUM, LINK IN BIO, FINALLY ACTIVE ON IT AGAIN! LET THE GAMES BEGIN.

Gaara

_Temari_

**Kankuro**

* * *

May 11th-

**Can I be Co-Kazekage.**

* * *

I'd rather have Naruto on LSD than you as my assistant Kazekage.

* * *

_That's an interesting...thought. _

* * *

**I would be better than that!**

* * *

I would rather Kakashi on crack.

* * *

**Don't be so harsh!**

* * *

I'd rather Gai being high on the job.

* * *

_Oh snap..._

* * *

**Gaara! **

* * *

I. Would. Rather. Rock Lee.

* * *

**BUSHY BROWS!?**

* * *

I would rather Temari on her period!

* * *

_Holy mother of god..._

* * *

**TAKE IT ALL BACK.**

* * *

NEVER.

* * *

**I WOULD BE AN AMAZING CO- KAZEKAGE! **

* * *

YOU WILL NEVER BE ONE.

* * *

**I CAN DREAM. **

* * *

_All your dreams are nightmares for the rest of us..._

* * *

**You are so heartless.**

* * *

I would rather...

* * *

**Shikamaru?**

* * *

NO. I'd rather the devil than him!

* * *

**Sasuke?**

* * *

Forgive my language but, fuck no. Fuck that.

* * *

_Well then._


End file.
